have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
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