May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
They took my balls.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
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