Buhtt sex?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
