.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
