i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
