He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
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