Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
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