Got a toothbrush?
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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