By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
