You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
