Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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