No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
