i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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