I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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