Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
It's just like the Real World with babies
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
