I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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