Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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