Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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