Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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