I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
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Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
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handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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