I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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