im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I will be naked everywhere
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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