Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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