It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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