I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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