i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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