That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
