Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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