all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
He felt like a one man threesome
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
