She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize