Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
