Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize