yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
