then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
