I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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