Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
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