your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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