I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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