I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Randomize