I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
