what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
