No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
