It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
