who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Can I color on your dick again?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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