margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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