well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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