If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Fuck appropriateness.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
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