Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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