it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Randomize
