office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
