I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize