I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
